stress... part 2

really really stressed
cos my studying is on SLOW progress....
everyone's practically half way there...
Im still dwelling on some chapters...
I thought I could face it positively, without worries and so...
who knew.. when I was lonely, I'd go insane and started going emo T3T
hearing friends sleeping at 1am...
I really want to do that too...
but I cant... cos I sleep too much!
I thought I was happy and had the ability to brave the exams...
but when Im in school, in front of my parents... that bravery is nothing but a mask...
a hoax I would say!
haiz... what to do? what to say?
really dont want to drop classes, cos all my friends are in the first...
if I drop... I'd be lonely... cos Im weird... and unsocial...
it took me practically three years to talk to EVERYONE in my class

I hope I will do well, pass everything at least...
not to get my hopes too high...
everyone has high hopes on me...
thinking I'll pass with flying colours again...
but they're wrong, I barely prepared...
it stresses me even more if they say so...
they dont know I feel...

as long as I do well, everyone will be happy...
teachers, friends and especially my family...
I just dont want to disappoint them...
it breaks me to see my family sad....

I just want to pass everything pls!!!
and stay in my class where we laugh and play together...
everyone's practically family to me now...
I dont want to leave them TAT

and now it's time for me to study!
sorry for making u read this tedious crap
zomg... I've flooded my room... just wanted to pour my heart out...
off I go now! praying I would make it through T3T
wish me all the best
and 1 month of insomniac....
EYEBAGS!!!!